Paraguay is an interesting country. It is only one of two landlocked countries in South America with the other being Bolivia. It has a population of 7.5 million people with a median age of 30 years old. It has two official languages, Spanish and Guaraní. The latter being the indigenous people of the region, and is also the name of the Paraguayan currency.  I was to discover it was also a country of choice for the Tin Hat Brigade but more about that later. I arrived late with booked accommodation and spent 20 minutes once I arrived, arguing with google maps and booking dot com that the location they were telling me was my hotel was not my hotel. Eventually, with assistance from the owner and WhatsApp I found it two blocks away and had ridden past it on my way to the wrong location. I never had this problem 40 years ago when I was hitching in Africa. I managed to get stung by a bee on my finger when I pulled into get fuel and took my gloves off. I must have collided with him enroute and he waited patiently pinned to my fuel tank. It hurt. And made it difficult to ride as it swelled up in my glove. I now always wear a neck buff, so I have some sort of protection in the narrow part of my exposed neck between my helmet and riding jacket. A bee sting on my neck could possibly kill me. And I hit quite a few.

The LFA House was an interesting place to stay on my first night in Asuncion, which is the capital of Paraguay. I chose it because it was on the outskirts of town and I knew I would be arriving late, which I was, but once I found it, I was able to take my bike inside and park it right outside my room. Which is very convenient when you are tired. The room was nice. No external windows but nicely fitted out. The guy running it was very chatty and told me most of the rooms are rented to medical students. It had several nice street places to eat at and they were just outside my door. Everything I need for a late arrival.

Next morning I had another hour of city traffic to get to my next hotel where I had organised to do a hash run. I can’t believe how big the city is but most of the people in Paraguay live there so I guess it makes sense. I had booked into the Residencia Leones de Castilla for two nights. At $200,000 Guarani a night ($40AUD) it was a bit above budget but all I could find, and it had nice parking with company for my bike. Even did a selfie with one of the other riders. The hotel was located in the middle of points A and B of the hash run that I was doing that afternoon. The hash run was with The Asuncion Hash House Harriers which is part of a world wide running group of beer drinking runners with a legacy of almost 90 years.

I have been involved with the Broome Hash group for a long time which I think I have already mentioned and have done nearly 400 runs with them. They run each week in Broome and is a great social activity. I have also run with various hashes around the world. They are known as the drinking club with a running problem. There are only a few in South America and so I have tried to seek them out. The couple that started the group in Asuncion are very proactive and lovely people and I ended up spending a bit of time hanging out with them.

I arrived at my new hotel before midday and the run was that afternoon at 3:00pm and it was a 45 minute walk to the start and it was bloody hot. Apparently the hottest day of the year. There were about a dozen hashers at the run, all in Asuncion for varying reasons and durations, and a couple of local lads. Everyone spoke English which made it easy. The run was about 10kms but fortunately the Asuncion Club are mainly walkers and so we walked the preset trail which included 3 stops for cold beer. We finished up at a restaurant and from there it was only a half our walk back to my hotel. It was a great afternoon and I met some nice people and saw parts of Asuncion that I would never had seen otherwise. The beauty of hash.

I made a decision to stay a bit longer because hash was having a third birthday weekend coming up and would be having 3 extra runs. And also there was a very active expat group in the city (remember the Tin Hat Brigade). They also had a few events on, so I thought I’d take a break from travelling and be local for a while. That great plan came to an abrupt end when I asked about continuing my stay at the hotel. There was a huge football match on the following weekend between an Argentinian side and a Brazilian side and the city was booked out for it. The lady at reception was lovely and said if I wanted to pay a weekly rate and stay in an unrenovated room, then there was one available. I had a look at it and to be honest it wasn’t much different to my $40 a night room except that the cost was $80 a week. I had to get her to write it down as I thought my Spanish was wrong and also, I had to recalculate that 1.2 million Guarani’s was only $160AUD. I had a home for two weeks and at that price it didn’t matter if I left early.

I know I ramble on, so I’ll try and be a bit more brief with what I got up to while I was there. I’ll try.

I also bought a new back tyre for my bike which turned out to be a bit of work.  In Paraguay they are half the price of neighbouring countries. I paid $160AUD for it. I got 16,500kms out of the old one which is pretty good for a stock tyre. I replaced it with a Michelin tyre which are supposed to be a good brand. Apparently, people that live in countries near Paraguay come here to buy tyres and for an extra few dollars they burn off all the new spikey bits that new tyres have and then dirty them up a bit so they don’t look new and they don’t get caught avoiding taxes when they return home.

I joined a couple of expats WhatsApp groups and went to a couple of their social events at a bar and a restaurant. Wow. You know how a vegan will generally bring veganism into the conversation early, well the majority of these groups are Tin Hat Brigadiers and they aren’t shy in putting out their views and sussing out yours. They aren’t physically wearing their tinfoil hats to shield themselves from mind control or government surveillance, but they’re not shy in talking about it. I want to add a disclaimer that I have a few vegan and tin hat friends, and like diversity in thinking, despite not agreeing with their views.

Apparently Paraguay has very easy residency laws and so a lot of people who aren’t satisfied with their home countries, come here to get residency and have a Plan B country to live in. And then spend all day on WhatsApp whinging to each other about the inadequacies of the country. And this finding a new country to escape the shortcomings of your own country is not new.  In the late 1800’s a whole group of Aussies moved to Paraguay for similar reasons and started a settlement call Nuevo (New) Australia. I plan to visit there and will write an update. I did meet a couple of Aussies at the social nights, but they quickly realised that I wasn’t one of them and sneaked away. There was a small sprinkling of normal people amongst the group.

So much for my attempt to stop waffling.   

Tried a few local dishes but nothing exciting. I asked for just veggies with rice at a reasonable looking restaurant in one place and got something barely edible (centre photo). I had Sunday breakfasts at the Shell petrol station across the street. All you can eat for $11AUD and they make a personalised omelette for you. You could also eat in a few places by the 100 gram. Just load up your plate and they would weigh it and charge accordingly. Ate quite a few empanadas. Food was probably half Aussie prices.

With the upcoming weekend of hash events I was able to help explore a few areas of where the runs would be set which was great fun, great exercise, and explored lots of places around the city and neighbouring countryside. I’ve also added a couple of pics of the sort of thing you find when walking the footpaths at night and why they have hash runs during the daylight hours here!

We went to a Guarani community (No pics), and I was dismayed to see the government had built them two lines of brick and tile square box housing which I feel was both culturally and environmentally inappropriate. Apparently they only just got water to them. The locals weren’t in the houses but sitting under trees and using some of the old remaining timber structures. The Australian Kimberley all over again. But, and it’s a big but, they all had power.

Because of the Itaipu Dam on the Parana River which borders Brazil, the power in Paraguay is very cheap. My friend said that his two bedroom apartment uses $16USD of power a month and $30USD if they run the aircon. So unlike the Kimberley all the little communities had cheap and reliable power. But more about this in another blog. We did a bit of intown route exploring to. Mainly to check out bars and their opening hours as they are pretty unreliable. I got to see the changing of the guard outside the crypt where all the war heroes remains are kept, and it is also the centre of Asuncion. I can’t say I quite agree with that after my one hour of city riding. And the famous steps. Whatever they are famous for?

Back in town I did some exploring and found a nice bikers Bar called Rock 66. And also some ritzy parts of town. A few areas had the streets blocked off during the big football match and had huge screens set up, It was all very lively. Football (Soccer) is very big here. There are some rich people in Asuncion but also some poor people.

The main run of the three day event started and ended in what is called a Quinta (Kinta). It’s an interesting concept not unlike a holiday house but more focused on an enclosed outdoor area with a lawn, pool and BBQ area. Maybe one bedroom, a small kitchen and a bathroom. Families or friends who live in the cities hire them for weekend parties etc. They come in all shapes and sizes.

We had a cook come in and do a big BBQ for us. I should have taken a before photo. The food didn’t stop coming. Lots of different meat and sausages and chicken hearts? After we left that night the owners come in and clean up so it’s ready for the next group. Perfect Hash venue and great lawn area for some silly adult drinking games.

It was also a nice 10km walk run and we got to check out the Paraguay River which is a decent size river and strategically important to Asuncion and Paraguay. It’s 2500kms long and leads into another big river and then out into the South Atlantic. It starts up in Brazil where I saw all that land clearing to create farms and I wonder how long it will be before the farm water withdrawal will start having impacts in Paraguay? There were great big barges on the banks of the river. The river was very low apparently and they were waiting for the rains up north. and a few pics from the other two runs.

My hotel was also near the cemetery and so I checked it out. A bit eerie and it smelt funny.

While I was writing a blog and keeping hydrated with water in the hot climate I managed to knock my water bottle over onto my laptop. My first reaction was to swear, pull out the power cord and then turn it upside down and tip the water out. I then laid it upside down on my bed which sucked up a bit of water and then toilet paper. I warmed it by rotating it in the sun a few times and then left it for 24 hours. It seems like it’s going to be okay. Phew.

All up I spent two weeks in Asuncion and had a great time but just before I was about to head off, I discovered I’d missed two important things that I needed to see and had to backtrack 350kms to Brazil to see them.